Pushing Past “Well….”

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What do I mean by pushing past “Well…”?   “Well…” is when I proclaim, “Well at least I’m not out here shooting everybody!”; “Well at least I didn’t eat the whole cake!”; “Well at least I didn’t cuss her all the way out!”.  It means cradling myself with mediocre excuses.   Well is comprised of the excuses I make when I am called out for my behavior, personally convicted, or expect kudos for not being “rock bottom” awful.  I have been writing my short term and long term career goals down again because I feel like my growth has stalled for the past couple of years.  I realized that my desire to grow in my career is not separate from the goals I have to get in bed by 9:00 pm, eat a balanced diet, exercise, and stop worrying about other people more than I worry about myself.  The desire to be more structured and regimented won’t happen in a vacuum.  I need all of the pieces to work together to score the next interview or finish the last mile in my daily walk.  I’ve been changing my diet and I have noticed the results within the past year and a half.  I am pleased with the progress with healthier skin and hair, but now it’s time to push past “Well…”.  I have new goals because I met some of the ones I established last year.  I have gingerly repaired precious relationships that were dead and I’ve learned to communicate more effectively.  What is my next frontier?  I now understand that performing at a high level in my career involves me getting the proper rest and rising at the same time to conduct my daily routine.  I am putting myself out here, and it’s time to push past what was good enough yesterday.  I want to go back to church.  I want to go with an open heart and not a bullet proof vest protecting by heart.  It’s time because I’m ready to stop making excuses and clinging to the past.  I won’t utter the words, “Well that won’t happen for me” ever again because that negative conclusion was based off of past data and old experiences.  Is it rough to push past “Well”?  Well…yes it is!  I am going to transfer the career goals I’ve written to a format that also includes dietary, recreational, and Spirit focused goals as well.  I don’t want to be growing in my career, but in the same place emotionally, spiritually, and physically.  I have started and stopped multiple times, but this time, I want consistency.  Voltron needs all five parts to fight off evil doers right?  Good enough is not good enough anymore.  I’m not comfortable anymore because I am finally admitting I want it all: all the rays of sunshine on my face, the sounds of dogs barking, sweaty 4-mile runs, chicken, the  laughter of friends and family, good times and gratitude for Sunday morning.   I’m off to an amazing start.

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